Many people have wondered why Father’s day is struggling to catch fire like Mother’s day. Well, the fact is, it is only men, children, and innocent naïve girls, yet to turn mothers who wonder. Real women and mothers do not wonder why. Indeed, they are not even surprised. They know it will take a miracle to ever catch up with mother’s day and actually, they are very happy and satisfied where it is presently. And I dare say even grateful that father’s day is not as powerfully celebrated as mother’s day. I have one and a half reasons why this is so.
Now, the full reason why Fathers’ day will keep struggling as long as mothers have their way is that women do not like competition, simple! Especially if there is a potential that that competing element can take their place or outshine them. They demand and must always be the center of attention. You cannot and must not, shall not, and should not compete with them or take the light off them. They alone must shine.
Parenting is a dual venture. But left to them alone, they do not like the fact that in the parenting venture another sex or race will compete with them for the shine and celebration as potentially best parents. The man should excel as a husband for them and a father for their children, but not for the celebration of a day reserved for parenting. For that, it is the domain of the woman and the mother alone. For according to the world, they are the best parents. This is the most fundamental reason that it will be most difficult for father’s day to ever in this world attain the same level of celebration as that of mothers’ day.
The celebration of father’s day, should it gain grounds and be recognized as a truly global event worthy of celebration akin to the way mother’s day is celebrated will if we are not careful make the world realize an interesting truth that has been hiding in plain sight. Men or fathers work, suffer and sacrifice more when it comes to parenting and raising children. This is the hidden truth that many people do not realize until they get into the parenting stuff. Like the way, until you become a parent or are consciously told and taught, you will hardly ever know that babies say “dada” before they say “mama” in their growth and language development cycle. O yes, it is true, but if you watch a lot of television and like most normal people form your perception about life from what TV says, you will never even imagine children say dada. In virtually all or most baby adverts, it is “mama” they calling! So yes, if father’s day is allowed to excel, a plain hidden truth will come out and it will not auger well for the shine of mothers and women as they need it to remain.
Pause for a moment and think about it. When celebrating mother’s day no one speaks about “responsible motherhood”. It is simply mothers are whatever they are and must be celebrated. And why is that so? Frankly and critically the biggest unconscious reason for that is because “biologically” the human race can connect the children to the woman body more than to the man-body. That is, it is the mother that physically and visibly carries the children for nine months. So the whole world “sees” their efforts. The very difficult biological exhaustion and stress they go through. And the world is in no way allowed to see and appreciate and be reminded of the “amazing and big sacrifice mothers are doing to carry its children” All that is true and at no point in time should anyone ever belittle the work, emotional and physical stress of carrying a human being for nine months. Especially in a modern world where you have to take this heavy delicate cargo to work and back each day. So yes, for that reason the evidence is in our face of the sacrifices of a mother from the very beginning.
What no one “sees” as effort and serious work, and here I dare say even more important than carrying the child for nine-month is the most amazing and divine work of the father who has to protect the sperms all his life in a delicate and very sensitive easy to damage hanging scrotum all his working life. we take it for granted, but the seed of life, the sperm is so important that without it, mothers will have nothing to carry. And it is a man’s job to carry this precious bag of life and giving nuclear power in between his legs every single day. And must actively and consciously protect them from damage. Consider for a moment the strenuous and difficult works and activities men do each day. Thousands of things that ca within a twinkle of an eye decapitate or destroy this handing bag in between his leg. It is so delicate that a simple act of sitting down, which we all take for granted and need can cause irreversible damage to the future of motherhood if perchance the man wrongly sits down. Not to mention other more dangerous tasks like playing football, carrying a woman, running, etc.
But alas, because men do not speak about it or “make the whole world see their sacrifice”, the world takes it for granted and hardly ever even think about it or talk about this noble act of fathers that men have been doing successfully for ages to ensure women become mothers. Carrying a delicate human being in front and inside you of you for nine months is not an easy thing. But to be fair, we can agree even if we do not want to that, it is not the easiest thing and most comforting in this world to be carrying the future of humankind in a delicate bag in-between your legs every single day of your life. Always aware of the fact that one single foolish mistake or possibly a kick from an angry woman in your groin can destroy millions of generations. Not just one baby, but millions of human beings.
This is one of the most dangerous and difficult tasks ever given to the male of the human race. It is a very serious and difficult task. But yes, as I said, it is just sperms, right? After all how heavy and difficult is it to carry a sperm? I mean you cannot compare carrying sperms, even if it’s a million of them in a delicate scrotum in between your legs all the days of your life to nine months of carrying one child in a womb. And to add insult to injury which man is walking around the world with his scrotum protruding for the whole world to see his good works or responsibilities.
Yes, that is it. The world cannot “see” the work of the fathers, but can “see” glaringly the physical work of the mothers and for that reason, the mother’s day celebration is automatically taken from the onset as default and for granted. On mother’s day, you cannot talk about responsibilities you just have to celebrate us for nine months of strenuous emotionally tasking work of carrying humans around. That is one of the core reasons why unconsciously mother’s day celebration is taken for granted. That mother must of necessity be celebrated. It is not actually because mothers sacrifice more in raising children. It is because it looks like their work is more glaring biologically and physically. But I have said and I dare say that in reality if it will be weighed, men suffer and sacrifice more when it comes to raising children. And men are indeed so important that the impact of a missing man in the raising of the children is more devastating to humankind than that of missing mothers in raising children.
O yes, men actually can raise and care for children better than women. After all, who do women go to when they want care, comfort, a listening ear and to be pampered? Men of course! These are the things children need most also, and it is a strange thing that adult female children called women, know who and where best to get this, and yet, when it comes to raising real baby children, the world believe women or mothers are better at it than fathers.
But that picture cannot be painted because mothers do not like the competition and if the real light is shone on the work fathers are doing in the world I can bet you that the mothers will place second when it comes to sacrificing for the children. There are enough examples to show that in situations where men are left with their children alone, they have been more than able and capable of raising them and raising them to become amazing citizens also. It is just that the stories of single fathers, like that of the scrotum, hardly cut through the noise of single mothers for the world to take notice of.
So, in celebrating mother’s day, the day is simply celebrated, but when it comes to the celebration of father’s day, any reasonable person who is observant will notice something. We cannot simply celebrate men and fathers in purity and without blemish. At almost every single father’s day celebration public speech, the world must be reminded of “irresponsible fathers” and the duty of fathers on this father’s day! We of necessity must highlight and tell the world that, o yes, let us celebrate them but we cannot shine too much light on them or else they will stand out, let us tarnish it with a reminder of “bad fathers messages” or focus on their work they have to do, not on all the amazing work they have been doing.
Automatically like magic, there is never a father’s day celebration where the issue of “responsibility” doesn’t come in. it is like father’s day “celebration” is the day to remind men or fathers to be responsible. We cannot just simply allow men to be celebrated; we must shift the focus from celebrating them and constantly paint the picture of irresponsibility so that people will not have the mind to think that men are working more than mothers. For if on your day of celebration you are reminded of all the negatives and or the work you still have outstanding to do, what kind of celebration is this and who will fully be able to enjoy the day.
In contrast, how many times have we celebrated mother’s day, and the major topics have been irresponsible mothers? Many will cry foul at this very thought, and for some, they cannot even imagine the idea of shouting about irresponsible mothers. But many also know how many irresponsible mothers we have in this world, how many mothers have for the show of “concern” prevented the disciplining of the children or raising them in the right way, how many mothers have chosen their work ahead of raising the children.
Many will be amazed at this, but it can be postulated that, if mothers were not biologically tied to the children, such as having the breast that produces the breast milk and or the womb that carried the baby, many women will not voluntarily go for conception and all the work involved in carrying a child for nine months and giving birth to them. And they will also if they had their way not sacrifice their breast for the child to suck on and elongate for at least one to two years. No, it will not be the natural voluntary choice of most women. And it is what is happening in our times even now. More women are choosing “freedom” to carrying children. Their body is theirs and they choose what to do with it, and one of the first things that get sacrificed is the human child for the pleasure and position of work and independence, comfort, and achieving of their dreams. With more women having the choice and being “liberated” what do we see, avoidance of childbirth, raising and raring of children, and reduction in giving babies the breast to drink the milk from.
What then we have is the woman or mother’s love and care for children is what we called a “biologically imposed” one. That of a man and father for children is voluntary for it is without a major biological restriction. And in a strange way that is why we can have potentially more irresponsible fathers and not mothers. Because for a father it is a “voluntary choice” But that is also the very same reason why fathers day must be more celebrated than mother’s day because, for all the thousands of fathers that are faithfully caring and sacrificing for both the children and the home in which their mothers dwell in, this is a choice taken voluntarily. It is a voluntary choice to “suffer”, to sacrifice, to work their head off just to make the home a safe place for both mother and child. To be a Father is a voluntary choice and thousands of men are doing this daily all over the world. On father’s day, the whole world must stop. For every single father out there is a testament to unconditional love. Yet father’s day is not celebrated purely. It cannot be celebrated purely. Unconditional pure love cannot be allowed to outshine the mother’s love, because mothers do not like competition.
So that is the first reason why father’s day will never be celebrated as fully as mother’s day, women cannot bear and take the competition. What has happened is that they have allowed it but not happily and excitedly, it has been done grudgingly and that is why it is taking a long terrible time to ever gain traction all these years.
The half reason why Fathers day will never be celebrated fully and without fathers being reminded of the bad nuts to make the day sober and take away the shine is that women have played the “victim” for a long time and somehow succeeded in making men look unloving and uncaring.
This strategy has been put in place so that in the future when they are old and weak and the men in their lives can no longer work and fend for them, they can be assured of the first love from their children and sons and for the work of taking care of them to be continued. It is an investment strategy and no one will sit down and just watch their investment evaporate in front of them. It is a seriously calculated and strategic act of the woman race and it will fall flat on its face if fathers globally become recognized for their great work and sacrifices. If the love of a father and the sacrifice of a father become glaring and clear to children as they are growing up, it will or may tilt the balance. Children will love their fathers more.
So from the very early stages, the love of the father is shrouded and the picture is not painted well. Staying away from home which is working and breaking their back just so that the home will have what is needed and children will be happy is painted as neglect of the home. Not carrying the babies all the time simply because babies need breast milk most of the time and so physically by biology they are connected to the woman or mother is painted as if fathers cannot handle babies, etc, etc.
You can make a case for the many thousands of sacrifices fathers make that make mothers have the ability to stay mothers. But this cannot be broadcasted. For when it is and it is truly painted for what it is, many children will realize the deep truth that their father’s even though they may not always be physically present did not love them and sacrifice for them less. If anything they suffered, sacrificed, and loved more. For who can quantify the pain in the heart of a father who cannot be there always for the children because he has to be out there working to make sure there is food on the table. Fathers if they had their way will spend all their time with their seed. Farmers do not plant and neglect the plant. But in this case, fathers have to sacrifice the opportunity to be around and with the children in order to keep the home running. And to imagine this is somehow painted and fashioned as fathers are not at home and caring” in the minds of the children. The one person who has the power to explain to a growing child the reason for the seeming absence of a father from the early stages of the lives of their children is the mother. They never and hardly do that. They rather enjoy and bask in the knowledge and attention of the child thinking “mama only cares and is always around”.
What do we see, what is the testimony all over the world? Many young minds live confused forever as to why daddy is always absent, especially the male children. Many never realize the true story of what is happening until it is too late. Hardly do children grow up realizing that daddy is away because of them and that if he had his way he will be always with them. unfortunately when it is usually too late, and the heart has hardened towards the absentee father and forever glowing warmed towards the ever-present mother that some children get to know the truth and begin to appreciate sadly and too late this tremendous love and sacrifice their fathers had to make for them. And this only happens sometimes when they also become parents or fathers. But like it is by this time, the heart and habit have been shaped and fashioned and formed. The place of the mother as the most loving parent and caring one is entrenched and that of the father as an “absent god-figure” is entrenched. So, father’s day no matter how hard we try will never become a fully loving day. Mothers who hold the key to the truth as to why daddy is hardly at home in their hands hardly impress and share it with their children. Some do, but it is the exception, not the case. And it is a very sad truth. But weep not; because it is not an accident, it is a conscious, deliberate calculated act by the mother. They cannot allow the father’s love to outshine their love, what they will do if children end up loving fathers more than mothers! This is an anathema it cannot be allowed to happen. The woman must be the victim to be loved and taken care of. It is just life, survival of the wisest.
To not take for granted the seeming impossibility of working and being there for the children, consider the recent complaints from working mothers about combining work with the home or parenting chores. It is not an easy thing. It is a very difficult thing and that is why it was wise that one sacrifice to go out and whilst one stayed home. But alas, this is not common sense in the modern world. Few “emancipated liberated” women nowadays see raising children at home as a worthy fulfilling job, it is demeaning work to them, so that can be sacrificed to also be out there struggling with the father. Yet mother’s day must take the shine, not father’s day!
Before I conclude let me share two bonus thoughts on why father’s day cannot be celebrated fully. If it is, the women and mothers will be forced to serenade, pamper and purchase gifts for the fathers. They do not like that. They the mothers must be pampered, spent on, and spoilt, not the other way, and especially not as fathers. Even as husbands they struggle to spoil you and now you are adding father’s day to it. No, we will not allow that. So think about this, has it ever occurred to you that, it is men and fathers who mainly organize and promote mother’s day treats and the same men who organize and promote father’s day. Mothers and women just nudge men and do what they do best, make sure they remember mother’s day is coming without fail. They hardly brazenly remind the world father’s day is coming. If there is any effort, it is men who try very hard to shout that father’s day is coming. Hardly will you see mothers running ahead of themselves to broadcast father’s day approaching. Now, how can father’s day ever win in this world?
So, women do not like competition and women do not like the “truth”. They must look good and be the victim also. The full love and sacrifice of fathers can never be allowed to be shown in public. Like the scrotum. It is amazing, isn’t it? So why do they celebrate father’s day? Do they? It is children who celebrate father’s day. Mothers actually hate father’s day celebrations, if they are celebrating it, they are doing it out of duress. It is taking the shine out of mother’s day and now giving mother’s day something to compete with. And like I said, “we do not like competition”.
Anytime father’s day is approaching, mothers get jittery because they have to tell the truth about fathers and have to spend money on their husbands…this is not good for the female race it goes against “nature”. My advice to fathers is simple, you cannot win this, try as hard as you can, just find a lazy chair and suffer quietly. Mothers will never fully celebrate you.
JtdNarnor 21st June 2021 (3:22 am)